I went to a job interview in Makati today. They made me wait for the whole morning but in the end they offered me the job. The benefits and salary that they offered were good but I really do not want the job because I prefer working in HR rather than in Sales. I said I would call back after the holy week to tell them if I will accept the job. I don’t know what I am waiting for because I have already made my decision and I am not taking that job. I do not want to start working in a field I am not happy in.

After Makati, Marvin and I had lunch. I wanted to eat at Eyrie but there was no Eyrie. I hope it is just being renovated because I will really miss the place if they do not open again. We watched Looney tunes on vcd but halfway through the movie, I fell asleep.

I am so bored with my life. Well at least I have Marvin to hang around with.

I think last Monday and Tuesday were one of the best days I had recently. We went to the beach with my closest college friends. Admittedly, there were lots of problems and it was very difficult to organize the outing but we knew that it will still turn out okay and it did. I never had so much fun and there was so much food. Many thanks to the seniors who enjoyed those wacky two days with me: Julie (who wore a two piece bathing suit and worried that her camera had no batteries), Anne (who was, as usual, her bubbly self), Re (who kept on singing “where is tall man”), Milet ( who drove all the way from Manila to Quezon and never complained that she was tired), Cha (who slept early and missed the charades and inuman), Buen (who prepared our very delicious meals), Aja (who slipped on the rug and was captured on camera), Ego (who was very patient in teaching me to swim properly and dive), RM (who gave me the bruise in my eye), Jay ( who organized the whole thing *clap clap*) and Marvin (who walked with me to the beach). Hay, that is one of the memories I will keep looking back on.

this is a shot of all of us.


Wednesday, I was able to see Patty at last. I realized how I really missed her and our escapades when we were still back at the dorm. After watching a movie with Patty, I attended the Blue Roast. First time I saw Gelo so decent, wearing polo, glasses and shoes. Not his usual shirt, cap and slippers. I guess the fact that we are all adults now is sinking in.

Thursday, pig out the whole day with Kit, Ego and Marvin. Marvin wanted to go to UP to recopy his grad pics so we went there and had lunch. We went back to the ACIL room and I slept. When I woke up Re and Milet wanted to eat isaw so we went back to UP and ate again. After that we picked up Nanan and we all went to Marikina for the bumpcars. It was so much fun although the guys were bumping me really hard. Adterwards, we ate again. Hmm…the life of a bum

Friday, graduation day at last. The ceremony didn’t last very long. I liked the speech of the valedictorian, I was tearing up but I tried to contain it because nobody else was crying. After the ceremony, I found my friends and while our pictures were being taken I was so sad because I knew that it will be a long time before all of us come together again. But I have to accept the fact that it is inevitable and it is not so bad because we will all still be friends even if we do not see each other everyday.

Sunday, went to Pampanga to attend Anne’s grad/despedida party. I could not really look at her because she kept on crying and when she cries I end up crying too. I told her I understood why she had to leave but I really don’t. I wanted to stop her and tell her that she doesn’t really have to go but of course that would be very selfish of me. I just hate the fact that she would be really far from me and I am not used to that. I guess, I have to start getting use to it now.

I have been bumming around for the past few days and I know that I have to do something about it. I’ll start going to job interviews starting this week so I can tell myself that I am doing something about my future.

Discernment. Discernment. Discernment.

For the past three days I’ve been trying to discern what I will do with my life. Name your crossroads and then choose the path that you think God wants you to choose. I stayed still and quiet hoping that I will hear God’s voice but the only thing I heard was the wind blowing through the pine trees and the birds chirping above me. I guess I just expected too much from the retreat, I expected to immediately have answers to my questions. I guess I expected too much so I feel so dissatisfied right now. I keep blaming it to other people, that the other retreatants were not strict with the silence. The retreat was too fast-paced for me…
I can complain all I want but in the end I am still stuck with my problem. I haven’t reached any decision yet. I do not know which path I should choose. The retreat director said that I should live life to the fullest. Carpe diem. I really am trying to seize the day and I understand that discernment is a process and I should not expect to have an answer right away but I just hope that whatever decision I will end up making will be the right one. I have been making wrong decisions all my life but now the decision I have to make would determine what I would become for the rest of my life. I hope I make the decision that would make the people that I love proud of me. For now, I will look at the past and the now and examine everything so I could see my options more clearly.

Seize the day and enjoy your life in the process….